Common Triggers We Feel in a Divorce and How to Navigate Them

"I failed"

This is one of the most common phrases I hear when working with people moving through divorce. Feeling as though you failed as a partner (or as a person) can trigger deep wounds in our self-perception. Remembering that it is not a failure to advocate for yourself or to prioritze your own wellbeing is key when these thoughts show up. Balance this with a realistic assessment of how you want to show up differently moving forward. What are your growing edges?

Fear of Judgement

Whether we fear judgement from our family, friends, or communities, it can be a daunting experience. Whether it was your decision to begin divorce proceedings or if you are navigating from the other side, remember that other people's opinions only have the power you give them. Be honest with yourself first and once you stand firm in your own truth, others' judgements will have less impact.

Loneliness

Transitioning from being in a partnership to being single is a huge change. This could include adjusting to sleeping alone, the sudden realization that the house is eerily quiet, or the grief of experiencing something new without someone to share it with. Holding space for these moments and resisting the urge to avoid those feelings is key in the healing process.

Cultural/Community Dissonance

Navigating potential shame around making a choice that clashes with the norms of your culture, community, and/or family of origin can make a hard process even harder. Finding support and reaffirming yourself is important as you navigate these emotions.

Feeling Incapable

Divorce is complicated. It can be so overwhelming to think about the choices and changes that need to be made throughout this process. Remember that you don't have to be the expert on everything. Ask for help, advocate for yourself, and be willing to filter information/opinions for what feels right to you. Just because someone gives advice doesn't mean you have to take it.

To schedule an intake appointment or a consultation call, visit the contact page. Embrace life transitions, discover purpose, and navigate change with the support of Emily R Counseling.

Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for professional advice. If you require assistance or are experiencing mental health concerns, please seek guidance from a qualified coach or mental health professional.